1007 - A Guy Who Never Dies feat. David J. Roth (2/3/26)

Right. Hello, everybody. It's Tuesday, February 3rd. This is your Chapo. Thank you, everyone, for accommodating my sick day. But we are back at it. Obviously, huge story. We got to talk about it. Let's get right into it. And today, Felix and I are joined by David Roth. Can't think of anyone better. We talk about probably, you know, the biggest story in the news this week. What is dead may never die. That's right. I'm talking about the Super Bowl. Let's hop right into it. David, what are the storylines going into this Super Bowl? Is Sam Darnold the fake demon? Or will New England's historically cream puff Mickey Mouse schedule finally expose them? I'm glad you asked, Will. I'm glad that I over-prepared for this episode because I had assumed that we'd be discussing something even more evil than Robert Kraft appearing on millions of national TV screens over the weekend. Well, you know what? Actually, Robert Kraft, that's a good segue into what we're actually going to be talking about. I could have said anyone. That is a good segue. I went, here's one I was, I had two planned. I was going to do either this one, you know, see the girls even Bill Belichick is saying are too young. But then I had, I had another, this is a really good one. This is like for true sports fans. This is for people who never miss a 30 within 30 or whatever the ESPN things are called. Yeah, that's what's called. You're going to wish. that Manti Teo was involved because you hope that these girls were made up because of how bad this story is. Yes, owner of the New England Patriots, Robert Kraft. By the way, David, I was watching ESPN yesterday, and it was talking about how Robert Kraft may not get into the Hall of Fame, and Stephen Avers Smith referred to him. He was like, I've long been a big fan of Robert Kraft. And I was like, Stephen. Is he a fan of, like a fan of what? I don't really like his teams, but I like his conduct with women. Like, I just like that he wears white sneakers with a suit. That's like, that's my number one criteria. Like, am I into a guy or not? I mean, like, I call him, I call him the blue collar billionaire. Because, you know, you could see him in the boardroom, but he will also just go to a massage parlor and get jerked off. Yeah. That actually, honestly, is pretty. proletarian of Rob. Like, it's like the most of these guys. And again, the thing that we keep saying we're going to talk about, eventually we're going to talk about. All of these guys only ever hang out with each other. Every like billionaire pervert on earth, except for like Robert Kraft got in a car and was like, we're going to a strip mall. It's in West Palm Beach. Yeah, he unwinds in the same way that the owner of like a gray market junkyard does. Yeah. Larry Bishop's character in Kill Bill, the guy that was yelling at Michael Madsen. That's basically Robert Kraft. You're working tomorrow? Yeah. No, you're not. You didn't know what fucking day you were. Well, yeah. Obviously, Friday.

The Justice Department was compelled through legislation to release another 3 million pages of Epstein emails. And I think I'd like to begin, but before getting into the specifics of some of the people sort of involved in this and what it implies, I'd like to think a sort of a broader meta view of what this implies about the world we live in. And I think the most important question to ask at the jump is, Why the fuck did he keep hitting that equals key on his keys? How, like, can someone explain that to me? I think that's the least, I think that's like the least mysterious mystery of this whole thing. In fact, it could be on a TV show called Solved Mysteries. I mean, anyone who is in the living grandparents club and, you know, some well-meaning relative has made the mistake of giving that grandparent an iPad or even a computer or a smartphone. This is just how old people use the keyboard. And even when someone isn't totally old, they're not completely elderly, Jeffrey Epstein, he died at like 64, 65. He's also really fucking stupid. Yeah. That's one of those, the dog that didn't bark in this whole story is that Jeffrey Epstein. dog shit brain just not a sharp guy he was not very smart which kind of makes this entire thing more disturbing the fact that he was like he he was getting the top scientists in the world really to come to his house and being like what if i clone myself and i won the lottery would that be like i won the lottery twice Yeah, there's stories about what those gatherings were actually like that I remember from the initial, like, reporting on it. Because, you know, after he was arrested, people were sort of trying to figure out what his deal was. And that, like, that work continues to this day. Like, it's been, whatever, eight years. And the bit that I remember, I don't remember what this is from, like, what story it's from. But he would, apparently, he would have all these, you know, scientists and... linguists and like some of them were like your Stephen Pinker grade public intellectuals where it's basically just like fake scientists like people that like work at Harvard and have like a difficult to maintain hair style but are not people people who write people who write like an airport book called like cognition the science of thinking right yeah like but some he would have those guys but then he would have like sometimes real physicists there and they would have conversations and whenever it would start getting into like areas that he didn't understand Epstein would have he would say what's that got to do with pussy?

Yeah, I always think about that. I always think about that. He was like, he was like the bad kid who's insecure about being illiterate. Yeah. Like it was so, and I always really wanted that footage of like Steve Bannon's stupid documentary about him. Oh yeah. To come out. Because I remember reading about this for like 10 years that Steve Bannon was either going to or had made a documentary about him. And I always wondered like what the thrust of the documentary is. because it's clear that Jeffrey Epstein was kind of the protagonist of the documentary and like what was his angle and I think what Steve Bannon was going for was just like oh he's not actually a pedophile he just like sold children because he's smart yeah And all like the things that Jeffrey Epstein says in those interviews are so fucking funny. They're the best like pseudo intellectual. They're like the type of things that like a kid who isn't quite in the gifted program but like takes one high school level class in eighth grade does. They rehearse talking about it for a dinner party. Like when he goes. There's different types of intelligence. And it's like, oh, that's really charitable of you, you fucking stupid pedophile. Felix, my favorite of his sort of philosophical pronouncements in the Steve Bannon interview is that one of the things we're doing wrong today is teaching kids to write. And he said, it's because, it's because Plato and Aristotle never wrote anything. They spoke, which like opens your mind to more complex streams of thinking. And it's like, A, thanks to the advice about how we should raise kids, a serial pedophile. I was going to say. But also number two, like, this is a guy. And here's, like, honestly, like, this is what I want to get to is like, The thing that jumped out to me about like, like a sort of, I don't know, like a facet of the prism that these three million emails opened up, at least that I was sort of hinted at, but I guess it was made more explicit this time, is that this is a guy and the people around him, certainly, were people who are obsessed with a eugenicist, like, racialist, like, IQ supremacy and particularly of Ashkenazi Jewish supremacy. And he was, he was, like, trying to, like, I don't know, like, we all know about his genetic engineering shit at Zohran Mamdani Ranch wanting to cede the future with his like genetically superior offspring. Once again, need to be established here. He is thick, like two fucking like plank, like some plank shoved together. Fucking thick. Like a completely midwit, no account, just dilettante entirely. If any, ironically, this probably has unfiliosemited. millions of people. Tons of people who like never met a Jewish person, but were just like, oh, I love the royal tenant bombs and they're Jewish. Right. I wish people like that lived in my town. I don't agree with them on every issue. And certainly the way they treated our Lord and Savior was very nasty and unfair. But you have to admit they have a way with words. And then you get the email that Epstein sent himself while he was clearly on LSD where he was like, reform.

some of the men will sometimes fall in love with who they perceive as like the dominant man. And I have to be careful to not actually sound like Epstein on the interview. Yeah. Because I'm getting dangerously close. Backing yourself into an evo psych position at Harvard University. Yeah. But no, I mean, it just like in male friendships, they're like the cool, like the coolest guy. There is like. At least with younger men, often like a de-sexualized type of romantic love. And most people grow out of it. But what was so perverse here is that all these guys had that for Epstein. And especially Peter Mandelson. Now, I mean, Peter Mandelson is gay, but his love for Epstein was not, like, sexual. It was just like he, this was the coolest guy he knew. Yeah. I don't think all of these guys are necessarily, are necessarily pedophiles. Like, if you look at the Larry Summers email. It's clear a lot of them. It's clear a lot of them just thought he was like a cool player. And that's why Larry Summers was like, Shoudi says she's not feeling me. What do I do? But for others like, I mean, probably Ehud Barak and definitely Peter Mandelson, they were like, oh, I'm kind of like a completely amoral piece of shit who thinks I am entitled to do anything to anyone that I am. There is a, I am chosen. There is, I have a born supremacy over everyone else. This guy, this is the only guy I've met who seems to act on that impulse in the way that I think about it. It's like the closest thing I can equate it to are the doctors, the doctor from from hell, his monologues. By the way, I feel like Sir William Gull just gave an interview to The Times where he's like, I've made some mistakes. Some of them my own. Others largely created by, you know, Alan Moore and the irresponsible. Well, good news for Sir William Gull fans, he's still, they're still keeping him on at CBS. The guy, he's going to be giving medical advice. The CBS dude, the supplements guy that they hired. Oh my God. I should be more specific. One of the two supplements guys that they hired. The one that's in the, because I don't think that Andrew Huberman. whatever else you can say about him. I don't believe corresponded with Jeffrey Epstein, but the Peter Ataya guy really did. And he, that is like one of the all-time examples in the bits that I've seen of what Felix was saying, where he's like, you know, again, like, it had been a decade in when they were corresponding since like.

Epstein had gone to jail for, I mean, it was for a pled down thing, but it was for sex trafficking. Everybody knew what it was. All of these guys were, like, at least around him while he was doing it. And Peter Taya, in his emails, is like, You live the craziest life out of anybody I've ever met, homie, and I'm just so happy. I'm so happy that I have you in mind. I'm so happy to know you. Thank you for the free game. Like, thank you for all that. It's just fucking incredible. Like, think about talking to someone you know who's on this sex offender registry and being like whenever I'm with you, I feel like I'm in Project X. Okay, first of all, did Felix and David, did either of you guys know who Peter Ataya was before this? No, man, I'm grown. I don't need to know that shit. You have some health and longevity guys. Is he like, put a small piece of tungsten in your anus and you will live forever? It's like on that sort of trajectory. Yeah, he's like, like, two tiers above, like, drinking colloidal silver. Okay. So, yeah, like, the thing he said in the emails was he was just like, Jeffrey, like, the craziest part about knowing you is that you live such an outrageous lifestyle, but I can't tell a single soul about it. And Jeffrey is like, yes, correct. It's like, that's right. And so Peter, Peter. Because I'd go to prison. Peter and Tyah, he posted, like, he posted like a long post on X today. sort of explaining himself, and he was like, the subject line in the email was got a new shipment. And he was like, to be clear, this was a shipment of longevity drugs or neotropics or so bullshit like that. But he was like, the comment about how I can't tell anyone about your amazing outrageous lifestyle was like, look, I was new to the world with hanging out with celebrities and powerful people at dinner parties. And like, in that world, it's just like, you know, you don't tell anyone about, you know, like, you don't be dropping their names, you know? And I'm just like, really? Like, you know, you go to a dinner party and, like, Paul McCartney is there. Like, yeah, I'm going to tell people, hey, guess who I had dinner with last night? Yeah. You know, like, you're not going to be like, you must never tell anyone about this. Right. Like, you have violated the code. Right. Assuming that somehow, like, the Fidelio rules just apply to every fucking get-together these guys have. Yeah, yeah. By the way, speaking of Peter Attaya, this is, he was recently just, you know, added to CBS News as one of their exciting new slate of contributors. This is courtesy of Sharon Waxman, who writes, update on the Peter Ataya situation. We're hearing there is a battle royale between Paramount Corporate and CBS News is Bari Weiss. She does not want to cut ties with Ataya and sees it as giving into the mob. Paramount sees it as an HR matter and that Ataya can't give expert advice. Folks, they're calling it the most successful rebrand of a legacy news media institution of all time. And I love this idea about like, like, oh, letting him go would be giving into the mob.

you know, like the mob of people who maybe don't want to take medical advice from a guy who left his wife and newborn infant who has suffered a heart condition and had to be in the ICU after their birth for 10 days on their own so he could hang out in New York with his friend, the billionaire pedophile and rapist. Yeah. I'm sorry. I'm needed at the sex mansion. I trust it. Yeah, I mean, that is like, that is like a hack joke from 2018. Like, oh, the, oh, the cancel culture against people who hung out with Jeffrey Epstein. Like, if I saw that back then, I would be like, you know, hit the showers, kid. Yeah. Try harder than that premise. But no, that's actually, that's actually it. Yeah. There was a bit, uh, Todd Blanche. who's one of Trump's attorneys, who's also now one of all of our attorneys. He's like the under U.S. Attorney General or something like that. He went on, I guess it was Fox. I don't know, they are one of those networks and said, like, to Felix's point, was literally like, it's not against the law to party with Jeffrey Epstein. which is 100% something that I would have put in a draft, looked at, and been like, do you really want this running under your name? Like the name your parents gave you? That's the joke you want to make? Yeah. Yeah, like, I have made jokes that are less on the nose than that and deleted them 20 minutes later. Yeah. I've been like, come on. Right, you got to do it. Basic quality control. Like, just don't think it's too obvious a gag. Speaking about too obvious a gag. I have noticed that like over the weekend and certainly Monday and today, like obviously the British press has been given the ball on this and they're like, they're like, you're going to QB this one. Yeah. Basically like, there's all the stuff we just found out. Yeah. And they're basically like Epstein's shocking ties to Russia uncovered. Could he have been a KGB asset? And it's just like, yeah, okay, all right. Yeah, like. I mean, that one's great because it's like even if you did accept that is true, which by the way, does not preclude him from also being an Israeli opera. Yeah. To go back to Russia Gate, which really should have been called Israel Gate, as an American, you, if you are going to do Russia, if you're going to get involved in some Lev Parnas shenanigans, the. most effective way to do it, the best go-betweens you can have are Israelis. Because they're like Vladimir Putin. Ever since he was mayor. He was, he's been super connected with Hibabad. A lot of his inner circle have dual citizenship in Israel, guys like Roman Abramovich. But besides that, I mean, okay, even if this was like Vladimir Putin completely, they concocted all of this. This is pedophiliaskema or whatever the fuck.

It still indicts like every, both parties, pretty much every elected official, every candidate for president we've had for the past like 30, 40 years. You still, like, if you come up with the blackmail and human trafficking pedophilia ring. People still have to come. They still have to participate in it. And it looks like everyone did. Everyone, that's what makes it that much more amazing to me when you hear about the few people that were like, whoa, this guy is a fucking vampire. I don't want anything to do with this. And it's basically, I can give you the whole. Shout out Nassim Rashida Tlaib. Yeah, it's basically, it's like, and norm. Weightlifting ass, Nassim Rashida Tlaib. Norm Fickleston. Norm, Bicklstein, obviously. I just feel like the, Norman Finklestein was really. obnoxious in an email response, but I think that that's just like, that might be like an auto response from him. Like if you invite him to something, he'll be like preposterous. You know, and that's just like what you're, which is fine. Honestly, it's greatly to his credit. Bill Gates's ex-wife. And then there was an amazing quote from the, like a Financial Times article. where Tina Brown got one of those like Epstein invitations that was like, do you want to come to dinner with Woody Allen and Prince Andrew? And she was like, what is this, the fucking pedophile Olympics or something? Like, it was just like, it was 100% like just seeing those names and be like, oh my God, why would I do that? No, of course not, which is, it shouldn't be that hard. Like the idea of like. Especially, because Epstein loved to do this, like dangling Woody Allen's presence as being like, I know what Elon Musk wants to sit near Woody Allen while he mumbles very quietly about playing the clarinet. That was like 100% like the crew that was at these things. That is really funny. Like how he would try to entice other people. Like he's trying to get David Blaine to hang out and he's like, guess who's coming to dinner? Yo-Yo Ma. And it's like, you need a consultant for this. Or I guess not, because that, like, mostly work. It only didn't work with stupid-ass Elon Musk because he doesn't know what, like, innuendo is. Oh, my God. I want to get to, I want to get to Elon Musk. I want to go down the list of some of our faves who are implicated in this, starting with Elon Musk. But Felix, I want to come back to the thing you said about, like, if you want to make this about Russia, like, equally, like, if you go deep enough, it's always going to come back to Israel. And, like, Look, it's obvious what's going on here. Like, the rape mafia that these guys have been running for the last, God knows how many decades. And, like, it's, you know, collusion or direction by the Mossad or CIA. The thing is, like, a key part of it was, like, not just the looting of the former Soviet Union's, like, I don't know, public sector and, like, your resources. But, like... the mass, mass, industrial level, like wholesale human trafficking of young girls and women from former Soviet bloc countries from, like, you know, Eastern Europe and Russia, and, like, exporting them to the West under the guise of, like, work visas for, quote, modeling contracts and, and, like, the offer of jobs, and then, like, of course, like, the entrapment of them in sexual slavery by...

This, yeah, the Zionist rape mafia. I don't know how else to describe what's going on here other than that. I'm really glad that people have actually been bringing this up because it has been one of the most frustrating things about any Russia discussion for the last decade has been the obvious papering over of how the West looted Russia in the 90s and created the perfect conditions for like, You know, like a shitty, like, national champion style of, like, of corrupt semi-Republican form of government. But also how, and this, you have to figure, this was, if not totally deliberate, the perpetrators saw it as a very happy accident, creating the easiest access and market for sex traffickers ever. The fall of the Soviet Union was one of the greatest opportunities for the fucking pimps and rapists and pedophiles who participated in not just this ring, but all the other mini rings that's orbited around this one. Guys like Donald Trump... No one has benefited more from that, from the desperation and misery and just putting people into the position where they would do anything. They would do anything to anybody. Nothing has benefited those types of people more. And no one who is culpable in the West will ever have to fucking answer for that. And I think like the one email that I think like, to me like was the most sort of stark in how much it sums this all up in terms of like that Epstein himself was, you know, a guy who was just sort of like a nexus point for like social networks, contacts. deal-making bribery and like this sort of I don't know cross-pollination of like a post-Soviet collapse like a global sort of like superclass of criminals who like began to like begin to loot the world and their own countries in exactly the same way that the former Soviet Union was looted by oligarchs and that is the email between him and Peter Thiel where he writes to Peter Thiel Brexit just the beginning Peter Thiel writes, of what? And Trump writes, I'm sorry, Epstein writes, return to tribalism, counter to globalization, amazing new alliances. You and I both agreed zero interest rates were too high. And as I said in your office, finding things on their way to collapse was much easier than finding the next bargain. This is the bit that's like, it's really, Ryan Broderick wrote this in his newsletter. And I've been kind of like turning it over in my mind because I feel like it can't. It's both one of those things where like there's no conspiracy about this that I have a hard that I can fully dismiss out of hand in terms of who's running him or what or you know who he's involved with or whatever. But then the actual possibility that.

this is Epstein after his arrest, you know, deep back in his like international pimp and financial criminal stage, basically being like a world in collapse is one in which I'm less likely to be held accountable for anything that I do and then working to make that world possible. Like that, it feels in some ways like, it's too simple because it is like such incredible comic book scale. villainy and storycraft. And yet, like, I think the idea of basically like a world in which everything has been smashed, there are no laws and the people that are in charge are like exactly as amoral as you and also in some ways like beholden to you. Of course, if you're like a monster, that would be a world that you would see not just like a great deal of opportunity in, but that would be. Like, you would aspire to it. That's a world where you would never have what happened to Jeffrey Epstein happened to you, which is dying a completely natural death in jail. Yeah. I mean, you don't want to... I think, again, this is a reason why conspiracy theories are popular because you don't want to think, like, that the reason that... your life is at least materially slightly worse in a lot of ways than it was a couple decades ago. And why there is so much misery and desperation and... poverty and just everything just gets so much worse is because of a guy because of someone this important, this nexus between the criminal political and financial worlds, a human Dubai, a meeting point between organized criminals and organized businessmen and institutions and politics, that he had the same thought process as a streamer who's like, oh, I just got accused of rape. I should become like based now. so people do, so my fans don't turn on me. Like it's, you don't want to think that it's that venal and simple and stupid, but it, but it unfortunately is. And another, I am almost, I almost like didn't want to bring this up because it does seem like a joke. It does seem like you're, you're making light of it by bringing up this like such a stupid, trivial thing compared to everything else compared to the horrible, sordid, unspeakably evil other things involved. But another thing I did find incredibly illustrious is, When Epstein is talking to Bobby Kotick, a former head of Blizzard Activision and a sex criminal in his own right, he pretty much comes up with the idea of microtransaction. Yes, that was incredible. It's not like every dehumanizing evil thing. Go back to this fucking guy. That's what I'm saying. It's not that micro transactions are on par with like.

taking these girls and women from these countries that used to have social safety nets and just stripping them for parts and probably murdering a lot of them before they are used up by Julian Gassablancus' dad and everyone else. But it is, it does illustrate like the kinds of the kinds of designs that Epstein was making it in the world. He was bringing the chintziness and pure profiteering of the organized crime world into the world of legitimate business. And it was not that before that, you know, there was none of this in legitimate business and that these things didn't all cross over. They did. But Epstein helped midwife this age where... everything, you have to insert a coin into everything to make it go. The Philip K. Dick world where everything is pay as you go and infinitely worse. He looked at the world of video games and said, hey, these are mostly consumed by children. There's a lot worse things we can do for the... There's a lot of ways you could squeeze money out of children. And all these guys went, yeah, hey, good point, Jeff. It's exactly... It also reflects, I think, the broader, like, sociopathic turn in capital in the last... I mean, it's not like it ever wasn't, but I think that, like, to what you're saying there, Felix, and this is, I think, something that's projected all through every interaction that you have with the market as a normal person. It's not like it was ever good. It's not like it was ever not exploitive. But there is this element now where it's not just every opportunity needs to be optimized to like ring people dry. But it is also this sort of thing where there's not, it's the relationship that. a criminal would have with someone that they're trying to get over. Yes. It is not the sort of thing where like a business that's like, you know, if they see you as a customer and they're kind of, which I think is like, you know, sort of even to the early days of the tech industry, they were kind of like, well, these are our users. We want stuff from them. We want their information and we want money from them, you know, either directly or from that information. But we have to give them something that they want. you know, in order for them to keep consuming it, which is like the basic logic of how any of this stuff works. That, that slipped out of joint. And at some point now all of those places, I'm sure that, you know, I'm not telling anybody anything they don't know, but this is like Facebook or Twitter or any of these things, that they're not. giving you like they want everything from you and they're not treating you with the sort of they're just assuming that you can't leave yeah yeah yeah david it's like he epstein was the voice on their shoulder and it's not that he was the devil and there was an angel but there was like

You know, the ghost of businessmen passed who was going, hey, these are your customers. This sort of maximize profituring where you're just shoving notifications and offers and treating everything like a slot machine. That's going to annoy people. It's going to piss people off. Your customers aren't going to like that. And Epstein was the voice going, Yeah, and what the fuck are they going to do about it? Exactly that. Like, and it's the sort of thing what's like, well, what are you going to do? I'm sorry you don't like being sex trafficked. I'm not going to like stop doing that. Yeah. Like it is, but it is a criminal perspective on the entire rest of the world and every person in it. I mean, like to add on to this idea about him as just sort of like. The pimp and midwife that has, like, facilitated and given birth to, like, a lot of the world that we live in today. And, like, you know, it's, like, hard to say, like, oh, it all connects to this or whatever. But, like, I think about, like, in line of that, that line that he said to Peter Thiel, about just, like, oh, like, let's actively break the world. Like, uh, and as it crumbles, just, like, make even more money. And, you know, like, a return to nationalism, a return to tribalism. Keep in mind, like Stephen Miller just today or this week is essentially articulating a view of the United States of America and like our culture and our domestic policy that aligns entirely with that. Yeah. And like, and I just think of that in light of, like I said, their own professed ideas of racial supremacy. And that like when you think about like the fact that he invested heavily in. promoting the science of racial disparity in IQ and race IQ science, which has become... the load-bearing idea behind the entire like new right movement that has been like cultivated on the internet over the last 20 years or so. Yeah. I think this also goes back to a point you were making earlier, Will, about like all these fucking brain dead elites going back and forth saying exactly to each other. That there is this sense in which they're like reverse engineering some merit into the reality that they exist in where they, these are like fundamentally mediocre people who surely have spent enough time around actual brave or intelligent or qualified or charming people to know what their deficits are, but are atop that... firmament, going back and trying to find out basically justify some way or other how and why that's the case. Yeah, you know, it's just like I exist as a person with essentially no limits. I believe that I have the right to, you know, steal, violate, torture, rape, killing, anyone, anyone who's not me because they're lesser than me. And like they're not, they don't have value.

And let me reverse engineer, like, a scientific and moral reason why that's okay. Yeah, here's why that's good. Yeah. It reminds me so much of a sort of nexus between these guys, a... Maybe the smartest guy that's ever interviewed Peter Thiel, Joe Rogan, who famously when he had Teal on, sometime in the last couple of years, said, well, you met Epstein, but it was before he got arrested. And Teal went, but actually it wasn't. And Joe Rogan just went, oh. It would be a lot better if that weren't the case. Yeah. Yeah, just really disheartening for anyone like me who used to enjoy listening to this friendly imbeciles podcast about how fun it is to drink milk. Joe Rogan's world, ever since he moved to Austin and created the comedy mothership, his new... comedy club and just kind of the way that he has talked about comedy in the last few years ever since really he it's always obnoxious to listen to comedians talk about comedy But ever since he moved to Austin especially, since he started saying things like the last, we're the last line of defense in the world. And there's only like 20 truly great comedians, and I'm one of them. And this way that they, they, he talks about comedians in his circles where it's just like, Comtown famously had a great thing about this, about how all these guys are like, that guy's an assassin, a fucking monster, idiot fucking killer. fucking rapist, idiot murderer. That is, watching these guys interact with Epstein, both in the emails, and like the documentary footage, all of it, it is like Joe Rogan and his friends were their model. This is how they talk to each other now. When Peter Thiel is talking about some other fucking lunat, when he's talking about like John Lonsdale, like the guys who started a fucking Palantir, he's like, that guy's a murderer, assassin, beast, killer. It's the same thing, the same sort of like self-aggrandizement through aggrandizing the group. I mean, like, and I guess, I mean, I guess that's what we're left with you because like, what we have in lieu of like prosecutions or justice for any of these people is there public humiliation by everyone reading what fucking like abject fucking like.

Not just psychopaths, but just like abject fucking dorks these guys are. And at the top of that fucking list. Like complete moral failures, but also swaggerless moral failures. Just, yeah, like the most, like, dickless, like, just charmless fucking buffoons who have all appointed themselves like the intellectual god philosopher kings of our world. And at the top of that fucking list is Elon Musk. is Elon Musk, who like, if you'll remember, was like basically just like, he was advocating for the release of the Epstein files because he was like, oh, the Democrats and all their billionaires, how like, you know, like they're going to be exposed. And it's just like, he is in that shit top to bottom. And his defense was always that like, yes, I've corresponded with him, but he was always trying to get me to come to his creepy island, but I always turned him down. And then we see in these emails, he's like, Elon Musk, like, no, he's always like, Jeffrey would love to come to the island. When's your wildest party happening? And then like, but the funniest thing about that is that they still blew him off. Yeah. Also, those emails, I love that that was happening. He was like in the version of islands. Christmas Day. Christmas Day. Coming into his emails like Dennis Hopper and Blue Velvet be like, baby needs to fuck. That's how he approached Jeffrey Epstein. I'm not looking for a weekend of like, like, you know, peaceful island relaxation if you get my meaning, you know, like, yeah. His family was in the other room, like, being like, oh, I thank you for the life-sized gerpina statue. We love it. Thank you for the bad luck Brian mural, dad. You know, it's like, I have a work email that I need to send in the other room that he went in. And it's just like, I'm fucking bursting. I'm going to bust. I need a slump breaker. Give me a 14 year old now. J.E. vacation being like, need to get my dick off, L.O.L. Yeah. I feel like socially awkward penguin right now. The greatest illustration of this are the emails that they exchanged where Jeffrey writes, writes to Elon Musk. Any plans for New York? The opening of the General Assembly has many interesting people coming to my house. And then of course, like, his just like absolutely like fucking, like his inability to read social cues or be cool or understand anything. Elon Musk's response was, I run and lead product design engineering for two complicated comedies. Moreover, SpaceX is about to launch what is arguably the most advanced rocket in history. Flying to New York to see UN diplomats do nothing would be an unwise use of my time. And then Epstein replies, do you think I'm retarded? Just kidding. There is no one over 25 and all very cute. He's just like, he's just like, yeah, okay, fine, I'll spell it out for you. Like, you know. Like, I wasn't inviting you to my mansion to talk to people, obviously. Like, we've met. Like, I, like.

I'm well aware of your, you know, like jaw-dropping, like, you know, like a salivating desire to rape teenage girls. And I'd be happy to help you with that, Elon Musk. If you could just play it cool for half a second. Elon Musk's instantly replying with the, like, Mike, try Mr. Wallace speech from the inside. He, this is like when the stabler goes undercover. Like, he's wearing a jeans jacket and he's like, Yeah, I'm in the illegal drugs business and the guys are just so frustrated that they're like, we are sex trafficking girls. They just scream it into the wire. Yeah, Elon Musk's standing out in this cohort as being like obviously the worst hang in a group that also includes thousands of emails from Larry Summers is a really amazing achievement to me. His defense, by the way, and he's going. Actually, the same thing that Jeffrey Epstein did of... I mean, all these guys do it. Every fucking rapist and pedophiles, they all have like a self rationalization. Epstein famously said, you know, what I was convicted, it was just solicitation. It's like stealing a bagel versus being a guy who killed someone. And there's that famous clip of him in the deposition saying he hates pedophiles. Obviously he was going to, uh, Elon Musk would do that no matter what. But that his, the backbone of his defense is I'm literally neurodivergent and a minor. Yeah, it is basically that, like, I wasn't picking up on these cues, therefore I kept getting invited to the fucking Fidelio parties, and I just thought that they liked strange monotonal music and masks. Like, I had no idea what was going on in there. Yeah. I mean, he also posted today where he was like, If I wanted to spend my time partying with beautiful young women, I could easily do it without associating myself with a weirdo creep like Jeffrey Epstein and still have 99% of my brain power left over to dedicate to other endeavors. Oh, yeah. He's nurturing that brain power. He's playing chess. He's playing video games, often doing it at the same time. He really marshals it. I like that he cannot get through a single sentence without being like, I have a space company, by the way. I'm involved in several businesses. It's like, he's like the guy from Memento. He always has to remind himself who he is. Right. Yeah. Okay, so what am I doing? Come on, I'm chasing this guy. No, he's chasing me. Felix, you mentioned a little bit earlier, Peter Mandelson. And, like, he's a guy that, like, you said, like, he was, like, Epstein's best friend. He thought of himself as Epstein's best friend. And, like, this has been known forever. And, like, he's been at the heights of, like, the British government, like, basically uninterrupted for, like, God knows, like, 30, 40 years now. He was the ambassador to the United States of America, like, yesterday. Like, like, this week.

And, like, we've talked before about, like, the British presses, like, sort of, like, D notice that they've, I'm certainly gotten from, like, MI5 or others that, like, they just simply, you do not talk about Peter Mandelson's relationship with Jeffrey Epstein. And, like, now, just the other day, he resigned for the labor, or he was kicked out of the labor party. He's had to resign from the House of Lords. And the fantastic, the fascinating thing is that just yesterday, like, the British press is still giving him, like, they get a big profile of him in the Times that was just like, allowed him to sort of like try to explain himself. And there is some actually great, uh, quick quotes from this piece. Let me just find it. So this is, this is, uh, this is an interview he did with, uh, the times, by, uh, the interview is done by Katie Balls, which I thought was great. And, uh, it's Ed Balls's daughter. Yeah, yeah. And, um, like, again, keep in mind, like, the scope of the criminality that is implied and just directly stated here. And that, like, Peter, and that Peter Mandelson has gone through several rounds of this over and over again. And, like, I guess he's finally had to be drummed out of the Labor Party. Listen to how the press, like, describes this. And the voice, like, what they allow him to say. He, right here, there's a quote, it was like a 5.30 a.m. drive-by shooting, the 72-year-old labor politician tells me on January 25th when I met him at his home in Wiltshire. I was at the edge of something. Suddenly I was put at the center of it. As a result of historical emails of which I have no memory and no record. The emails also came as a surprise to Downing Street. After receiving the call from number 10, he and Rinaldo were told to be out of the residence in a week with everything packed up and removed. It felt like being killed without actually dying, he says, looking back at what he describes as a life-changing crisis. I reply that I don't know how that feels. Well, I can tell you it's a unique experience, he says. I mean, I'm navigating the experience because I have really good friends who are helping me to do so. Starting with Rinaldo more than anyone else. Rinaldo being his husband. It felt like being killed, that thing that I don't deserve. It felt like someone killed me. Worse even than sexual bondage, far from my home. It felt like I was the victim of a drive-by shooting. Another thing that should absolutely... I do not richly deserve. The thing that I'm already dreading about this next, I mean, because I'm also, there's a part of me that like as much as these people are being humiliated in public and nobody will think of them the same way. The mechanisms for actually holding them accountable are not existent anymore. If they are, if they do exist, they're like literally under the control of Kash Patel or whatever. And you can't expect very much from that. There was a tweet the other day about him.

responding to a call while dressed like the IKEA monkey waiting to get into Burgain in her room. And that's like how I'm going to think of Kash Patel from now on. Yeah, the director of the FBI is a guy who had his first girlfriend like at the age of 45. Yep. And it's now just like flying her like she's got one person that she can do like trust to do the pedicure right. So she's always getting on some FBI plane and flying in Nashville. But what I mean is by this is that she's such a. Party downside character, a Swiss country singer. Yep. See, like one of the darker timelines for escapades, like, second act. But the thing I was going to say about it is that while we're, I'm assuming that we're not going to see the accountability that we want for a lot of these guys. I am already kind of, and the Peter Mandelson. bit that you've read from as a good sort of preview of it. The prospect of each of these guys getting in their local cities like luxury living magazine or in like whatever on fucking CBS News in conversation with Bari Weiss, them getting up there and talking about how. difficult this actually has been for them and how they've grown from the experience. Yeah. It's like the very thought of it is nauseating to me. I mean, in the annals of hilarious excuses, I would like to highlight this from the Times Mendelsohn's profile. Peter Mandelson continues to dispute several of the allegations. He accepts that his husband took money from Epstein, whom he likens to bubonic plague, to fund an osteopathy course. Why accept it? Epstein told Rinaldo that he had an educational foundation which gave bursaries or scholarships and offered one for an osteopathy course. I saw this as kindness, nothing more. It was a great help to Rinaldo and I thanked him. And now? In retrospect, it was clearly a lapse in our collective judgment for Rinaldo to accept this offer. At the time, I was not a consequential decision. There is no suggestion of any wrongdoing by Rinaldo. Only Peter Mandelson was also business secretary. So didn't this open him up to potential bribery? Epstein was lobbying him to change the banker bonus rules. There was nonstop discussion from the entire industry about reforming the banks and how to strike the right balance and regulation, Peter Mandelson recalls. Did he give Epstein's views on the issue's extra weight? The idea that giving Ronaldo an osteopath bursary is going to sway mine or anyone else's views about banking is simply risable. Simply. It's just like, it's just. Like, why did he give it to you then? Right. Because he's friends. He's her friend. Yeah. Yeah. He gives gifts to my husband. Is that like, why would that impact me in any way? How would that influence my way of thinking about him? I just, I love the way that people talk about this where it's like, I don't remember any of this, but here's exactly the rationale I had at the time. And it's just like, you can't, no one else is really allowed to do this.

If it turned out that like, you know, someone, like if R. Kelly had a bunch of co-conspirators in the music industry and they, like, abused the girls that lived with R. Kelly. And they were like, you know, whatever producer, whatever singer, whoever, they, you know, let's say it's the maroon five guy. He's in trouble for more than just being our generation's Lord Byron. And he, they're like, Adam Levine, what the fuck? And he's like, oh, yeah? Well, he paid for my cousin to take a male doula class. Not such an easy choice, is it now? You would be like, you should kill yourself. But with Peter Mandelson, it's just like, it's a mistake we all could have made. And by the way, like, the context for this here is that like when Peter Mandelson was in the labor government and they came up with the policy that they had written regarding the taxation of bankers bonuses or regulation of the banking industry. I mean, people have put it in this out, within four minutes of Peter Mandelson receiving confidential government information about British tax policy, he sent it immediately to Jeffrey Epstein, who then sent it to Jamie Diamond, who directly threatened the British government if they began to tax the bonuses given to bankers. That's the bit where I think it really, like, any sort of justification that this is like, I mean, just it all crumbles in the sense that, like, they clearly all. valued their own comfort and prominence over any other persons or any other concern in such a way that like, I can't assume the, you know, the best for any of these guys because like there's no evidence in these millions of pages of them ever doing anything for any reason other than their own convenience and status. So like, how could you give Peter Mandelson the benefit of the doubt on anything? When like everything that you see in terms of an indication of what it is that he like the soul like from this glimpse into his decision making process. There's no. There is no process beyond the idea of like simply continuing to like grease the wheel that turns and keeps you prominent. Peter Mandelson has, you know, he referred to Jeffrey as my best pal. Now, I'm sure you guys saw in the emails, the one that was like just the one sentence that was the most jaw dropping was someone, someone replying to him with simply by saying, love the torture video. Our friend of the show, Aup Lovely, has, you know, he's done some sleuthing, which would seem to imply that Peter Mandelson was the sender of that email. Look, I need to look more into this, but, you know, our good friend Aup continues to be the most vindicated man in the United Kingdom. Yeah, Aup, I would say, is the world's foremost Peter Mandelson scholar. And I told him yesterday that he reminds me so much of the detective from...

I think our second most reference movie after Casino, Citizen X. Yeah. And let's hope that Peter Mandelson meets a similar ending. Yeah. There's just like there's too much. There's too much here. Like the thing I want to close out with is my personal favorite reactions to these disclosures, which is basically like the people who are just trying to say like, No big deal. Like, we've known about this forever. Right. And, like, top of the list is editor-in-chief of a Quillet magazine, Claire Lehman, who just said, am I the only one who's bored by all this Epstein stuff? And it's just like, sorry, Claire. I know it's not as scintillating as anti-Semitism on American college campuses for your Australian magazine. But like, come on. Like, it's just like, oh, it's like boring. It's just like a literal cabal of international rapist criminals suborning democracy and human rights the world over on behalf of a, you know, genocidal foreign country. Wow. And what a sleuth about it. laughing at all the damage that they do. That is kind of boring relative to a student at Rutgers wearing a kaffia at a class. Yeah. It's not as exciting as like finding out a company with 30 employees had a DEI seminar in 2019. That is like, you know, pull your kids out of school stuff. The first reply to that Claire Lehman thing, it was... multiple, multiple time guests on the show. And I think owner of the best hat in media. I certainly think so. I'm waiting to see if you're going to say it's me. Well, I mean, you, let's just say you have a lot of newsstands to go to. Yep. If you want to get this guy's stuff. Matt Taibi. Yeah, a long time. When I saw those, when I saw those two together, my computer actually bricked because it said warning, too many IQ points on screen. I mean, the combined IQ of this image is too high. Because like, If you want to say, like, oh, we've known about all this forever. Nothing new here. Well, like, what we've known about is like bone chill is like unspeakably evil and not a single person has been fucking sent to jail over any of this. So how can you say it's like, oh, it's old news, old story. It's just like, well, fucking, well, yeah, like, okay, if this is like, yeah, like the same revelations of like, you know, the depredations of this criminal and everyone around him, well, that it's just like he's the only one that's dead. And he never even got to testify about any of this shit. Also incredible for like public intellectual types. Yeah. All right. So a lot of this is known, right? That like, Gawker was writing about Jeffrey Epstein in like the 2010s. Like he's been to jail. It's been litigated. Like all of this stuff. Like so not all of this is new, new. But you're in the fucking ideas business. There's nothing interesting about this to you?

Like this look into like literally fucking millions of emails between the people that control your life and the country that you live in going back and forth like fucking like LOL they're going to hate this recession. Like those guys like there's that doesn't. kindle anything in you in terms of like commenting on it. If it's not reporting, it's at least the sort of thing that you could look at and draw some sort of point from you would, because that was fucking Matt Taibi's job back when I admired him, you know? Yeah. By the way, how can Taibi call anything boring after the fucking Twitter files? Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. It's like that. Oh, yeah. Exactly. It's exciting. It's fucking 7,000 emails of like. you know, every company with an annoying HR department doing cover your ass stuff. Right. Yeah, not, not as fucking thrilling as jaw dropping as that shit, yeah. You know, like the censorship on social media apps, you know, unlike, unlike now, we're like, you know, it's just like an absolute, you know, thank God free speech has been restored on all of our social media platforms. And it's not like, you know, it being controlled by the exact same gang of crooks implicated in these fucking emails. Matt is such a brave truth teller that the now the only guaranteed way to get him to shut the fuck up is to ask him what he thinks about Israel. Because he's too much of a fucking pussy to go, I love them. They trigger people because he knows that's unpopular, but he also knows who his paymasters are. That's the only thing that shuts up him and Walter Kern. Oh, Walter Kern. I love all in the air. He's been amazing now. I used to work with Walter Kern in my previous guys in publishing. I read stories, magazine stories and stuff by him. The idea that he's like one of those guys that moved to the Mountain West, got really into his phone and went completely insane. It's like, I know there's like a many such cases scenario, but I liked working with him and I thought he was a good writer, but the book of his that I worked on was his. a memoir account of being duped by the famous conman clerk rockabellers well fucking fucking kern when he was defending this said you know uh yawn i've had nights out that make these emails look like uh fucking a bible study and it's that's such a good defense yeah yeah like uh I've had pedophilia parties that were more crazy on a school night. Yeah, that's amazing. To go one level up from the, like, it's not illegal to party with Jeff Epstein is like one level. And then the other one is like, it's not even impressive to me to party with Jeff Epstein, given the shit that I'm in you. That's rookie numbers. You're like, yeah, I've been to parties at Elizabeth de Bathory's house. You know, that shit is lit as fuck. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Actually, I hang out with H.H. Holmes every week. But I, like, the obvious thing, though, is of course you would think this was boring and also want to avoid talking about it. If all the guys in these emails are going, here's our awesome plan to ruin the world to make ourselves 3% richer. It's also all the policies you agree with. Right.

Yeah. It's every single thing you think is good. These guys are saying, all right, I hope everyone enjoys their shortened lifespans and worst lives from this policy we love. And it's something you've spent your entire career going, this is great. That's the bit that it's really fucking bleak to sort of look back on it too. And that's like all of the little, the pet obsessions of these guys, AI and crypto being foremost among them, that like to see first of all like what fucking. Just loser butthead mediocrities won. like tipped over our public life so that they could have their toys be the most popular toys. But you see this with like, I was thinking about this looking at the response that Elon Musk had, you know, yesterday where he was like, yeah, I could have gone to the island plenty of times, but I was too busy like being the best Warcraft player in the world. That like all of the, if you look at that post, there's a reply to it from Grock being like, that's right, boss. I agree. And then underneath that, it's a bunch of fucking guys, like, just with names with a bunch of numbers flogging shit coins. Like, it is, like, they got the world that they wanted. And it is, like, an unconvincing denial of attempted sex crimes being plus won by the, the based AI, and then floated numerically by Bitcoin scammers. Like, Philip K. Dick, I mean, has there been a more prophetic American author? Yeah. I'd be like just the time to revisit his books. But in terms of a few other digressions, David, you might have noticed that in another email to Peter Thiel, Jeffrey Epstein offered to help finance his lawsuit against Gawker. Yeah, very generous. Yeah. And just personally from my own, for my own personal reasons. The participants in this chat are redacted, but this is like two messages sent by Jeffrey Epstein. One is custody battle, notwithstanding, would have been easier if women were never given the vote. The next message, I'm like, I don't know the context here, but like this is from Epstein. The Senate should watch clips of Judge Judy and the claims made. Abortion pills and smoothie is mild. One yesterday, John Jay College, I never told anyone and always looked happy for years after because I practiced in the mirror looking happy after the rape. The reference to abortion pills in the smoothie. Who could that be? Who could he be referring to? Why, it's just merely the same allegations made against Trump communications had Jason Miller, a dear friend of myself and Catherine. Yeah, it does great work. Remember that? Remember that? Hey, remember when he sued me and my girlfriend for millions of dollars? Oh, that's right. Over the disclosure of allegations made the exact same allegations about nearly killing a woman with...

An abortion pill secreted into a smoothie he gave her that reacted with street drugs in her body, causing her nearly to bleed to death. That was the allegation in the article that Catherine published that got her sued. And then my reference to him being a, quote, rat-faced baby killer is what got me added to the lawsuit. So shout out Jason Miller once again. Another shout out to Jason Miller. Jason Miller, the only guy in this entire email who could not get his lawsuit financed. by any of the multiple billionaires who he, he at least saw them, like, throw a kid down a garbage shoot. He at least knows who their Ray Donovan is. He has some form of like, at least social blackmail on these guys. And they just find him so repellent. Even them. They're like, you're on your own asshole. That would be a good actual blog idea of like the number of people. It's probably like 10 people. Like who did Jeffrey Epstein say like you're on your own kid too? Like who were the guys that he like didn't meet the standard of him just like giving them $50,000 of the Victoria Secrets guy's money to go away. Jason Miller less charming than Woody Allen, Ellen Dershowitt, Peter Mandelson. Let's socially adept. Once again, I have to come back to the idea that when Barry was like pitching her relaunch of CBS News, she was like, we need to marginalize voices like Hasan Piker and Nick Fuentes and replace them with charismatic mainstream ones like Alan Dershowitz. And it's just like... I got to give a shout to Jeet here who says that, like, her CBS News is, like, a Operation Paperclip for everyone in the Epstein files. Yeah, it is incredible. Like, she's still, like, she's still like, oh, we can't give any to the mob on Peter Ataya. It's just like, why are you sticking your neck out so much for these guys? Like, is it really that? Can't you get another dubious health expert to, like, charm America's senior citizens? I don't even know if it's because, I don't think she has a very transactional. series of relationships, I feel like with other people. People like her, like, which is more than you can say for, you know, a lot of the other people in here. But there's a sense where I think that the defense of Peter Otay, which is, I think this is arguably worse than being like, I know him and he didn't mean that or whatever. I think she's like, it's about the principle of it for her, where it's like if you fire somebody that was constantly going back and forth. talking about sex shit with Jeffrey Epstein. If you fire one, then you're going to have to fire all of them. It sets a bad precedent. Which is incredible to get that abstracted on something that is this disgusting. Like that is really, to the extent that she has a singular talent, I think it's that. That she can always find a way to make it about the single most morally obtuse and uninteresting angle on a story.

And, you know, it's not like firing for someone for cause over something that's genuinely immoral, like Mitch Rachel saying it's bad to kill children's by the tens of thousands. You know, I mean, if you're that kind of monster, obviously we can all come together and condemn you and, you know, bar you from public life. Or just marginalize that voice. Yeah, yeah. Um, what a time. What a time. But, uh, I, I guess like, uh, maybe, maybe to end the show here, I, I, I have a, have a, have a little pallet cleanser, okay? Because, I mean, like, we're looking, we've been looking like, you know, just gazing into the abyss here. But let's have, let's have a, uh, look at the lighter side of the news featuring, you know, one of my favorite figures in American political life, representative Nancy Mace. Oh, she's very, you know, like, Mace, defense squad, assemble, shield wall, now. Okay, look. The lame stream media is, you know, out with another hit piece on Nancy. And, you know, like the Mace squad is here to defend her. So let's just jump into this profile. They call me Bear Mace. That's my name on the team. So going on here, it says, here's some of the best stuff here. It says it's basically how a lot of people were excited by her and many of the people closest to her seem to believe she has lost her mind after being in D.C. for like, I don't know, maybe a year. Let's not rush to judgment. Yeah. quote, her staffers, as well as many inside the Republican Party, thought she had potential, a willingness to both take risky, heterodox positions, and to submit enthusiastically to the ludicrous demands of the modern attention economy. She could come off as a bit nuts, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing in the age of Trump. One person close to Mace recalled the way Bill Maher described meeting Trump for the first time. In this person's experience, Mace was not a crazy person, but someone who played one on TV. Five years in, however, it's unclear if Mace actually knows the difference between the two, according to former staffers. We've moved past that now. The person said, something's broken. The motherboard's fried. We're short-circuiting somewhere. Back then she came across as a breath of fresh air to a former staffer. And then I got into the office. And after six months, I was like, man, this is one of the worst people I've ever met. I'm going back to South Carolina. Her antics were a problem well before airport gate. During her first term, staffers say, Mace would command them to bring her liquor after midnight to keep parties going at her home, which is technically an abuse of her office according to House rules. Look, when I worked for her, our poor scheduler was getting calls at 2 o'clock in the morning to come bring her bottles of tequila, a former staff reclaimed of incidents they were called going back to 2021. So we have consistently referred to her as like representative, whoa, Vicki. Whoa, Nancy. Yeah, she's whoa Nancy. And she does, like, she has a similar personality. But I think like this article changed my mind. She's more like,

Another, we are, you know, there are a lot of firsts for women. We've been talking about how, like, the rare woman, male style liar, like the woman who, who, uh, told me that she, uh, walked 20 miles every night in preparation to become a psychologist for structural. And I was like 22, so I was like, really? But, um, Nancy Mace is, uh, a rare lady Jim Leahy. Lady Lady. Yeah. Okay. Speaking of Lady Lady, per the tequila story, Woe Nancy posted this today on Twitter. Representative Nancy Mace, she writes, Press should really fact check before running lies. I have a lifelong genetic affliction which prevents me from consuming much alcohol. It's called hemochromatosis. Look it up. And to illustrate this, she shared a photo of herself, sipping a beverage out of a coffee mug held up to her face. And the coffee mug has the words not tequila written on it. And look, I'm just going to say, I'm going to say, if you own a coffee mug that just says not tequila, The chances are you probably have some sort of, I don't know, let's say fondness for alcohol. Posting a video of herself drinking a frozen margarita in one go while shaking her head sadly to show that she's not enjoying it. I'll notice here she also said she has a rare, she has a genetic condition, affliction, which prevents me from consuming much alcohol. More than 30 drinks in a night. Yeah. Having like having the not tequila mug is so great. That means you're a drunk. Yeah. I would give anything to see because she had that already. I would love to see the argument she had with like, I mean, if any woman has ever been in a death feud with her mom from the day she was born, it's Nancy. Nancy Mace and her mom. It's probably like every Thanksgiving is probably like Roddy Piper and Keith David. They are just keying the fuck off on each other. The thing that he's trying to get her to put on is like one of those party helmets with two big room for two beers on each side. Yeah, yeah. Try this. Pace yourself for once. Fuck you. I would love to see the argument that led to that mug being made. Because she's that great. All crazy people kind of have this mix, this mix of passive and aggressive aggressive. Yeah. Where she will get a mug about an argument that you had a month ago. a mug that hilariously says not tequila and then whip that mug at your head because she had a dream that you lent you like went to le pan quotidian with her enemy from high school

Yeah, the call on a male style lying is extremely good to me. Kristi Noem was another example. This is like a real, a great administration for that. Kristi Noem's story about like what she made up out of whole cloth that she's like, I locked eyes with Kim Jong-un and I saw him piss his pants. Like that is just like one of the craziest lies you can tell. And her just like, she still won't admit that it's not true. Oh, she just like brass balled it through it. You know, like, by the way. Like Nancy Mace is doing the front that. version with this where she's like, I don't even like tequila, it was cocaine. Really bold. And I do, she would, she would, oh my God, she would be one of those people who, um, is like, yeah, I actually, it's impossible for me to get drunk. Yes. And I do have the airport gate as well because they mentioned that was like kind of like the maybe like a watershed moment with this. It says here, Mesa has continued to shed much of her staff, torched her relationship with President Donald Trump, and torpedoed her bid to become governor of her home state of South Carolina. By the way, she torpedoed her relationship with Donald Trump by voting to release the Epstein files. Yeah. Yeah. A rare misstep. I love that she got forced into that because she's been doing this insane thing where like she says that her fiance, her ex-fiancee was in charge of this like, like his own Epstein ring. I cannot. Can you figure this out? No. I cannot. He's been going onto the floor of the house where she's legally protected. from saying stuff like this. Like she, he, I don't think can sue her for defamation if she says it in that. That's so cool. And then she says, yeah, and then she basically like accuses him of being Jeffrey Epstein or at least I'm like, you can't rival someone in the congressional record. Yeah. That's so cool. If you're listening, please elect me to Congress. I will take, uh, but I love airport gate too. It says, Her erratic behavior burst into view in October when she had a meltdown while going through security at the Charleston Airport during the government shutdown. I rate at her police escort for not meeting her at security. May started loudly cursing and making derogatory comments to us about the department. She reportedly stated that we were fucking incompetent and this is no way to treat a fucking U.S. representative according to a police report I obtained. Airport Gate has since become a major news saga in South Carolina, hurting her standard in the... standing in the Republican gubernatorial primary. In polling since October, Mesa's support has been cut nearly in half, and she has slipped from nearly tied for the lead to down to third or fourth place. And I just love this because, like, she expected as a congressperson for a congresswoman from South Carolina that she would be treated like fucking, I don't know, like, like. like the Pope arriving in America or like President G like that same level of security like where's my motorcade of like 11 armored SUVs wait security's not even gonna meet me at the gate it's just like get over yourself Larry I remember like like Congress people take commercial flights all the fucking time it's not a big deal also like and I don't want to I don't want to

you know, sound like I'm bragging here, but I've been to the Charleston airport. It's like eight Bill Gates. You don't need to be like hustled through it. You get there 40 minutes before your flight leaves and like not be troubled at all. Yeah. You shouldn't do that though. You should get there a little earlier. It takes a lot for me to be on TSA's side, but holy shit lady. I like after this happened, so like all the South Carolina Republicans are like turning on her. And after this, did you see how Lindsey Graham was like, I love the guys at TSA. They're very discreet. Back to her staffers, though, it says, when they weren't buying booze for her, they were doing her housework, according to former staffers. They say she made her aides clean multiple properties she was renting out on Airbnb instead of paying for a maid. On election night in 2022, for example, Mace instructed AIDS to spiff up for a $3.9 million home in Isle of Palms for a watch party, according to former staffers with direct knowledge. She would routinely do the same when she rented out her Washington townhouse, according to the same source, and another Mace alumni I spoke to, including another former staffer assigned to do the cleaning. She was obsessed with monitoring her reputation online. In addition to reportedly having her staff create burner accounts to defend her, Mace allegedly instructed a staffer to go on Reddit, to go on Reddit forums about the hottest women in Congress to boost her standings in the rankings and comment where needed. Mace was very adamant about getting the staffer to upboat any posts about the Congresswoman and her attractiveness, according to a former second staffer. To which I will merely say, Nancy. I was doing this for free. And I don't know. Nancy, I was doing this and I didn't even work for you, my sweetheart. Pro bono. Yeah. Yeah. You got three guys on this podcast that all think they can fix you. And we all think you're out of pocket with this. This is like the most Rube Goldberg format version of sexual harassment in the workplace I've ever encountered. A emphasis on the word Rube. Rube. The idea that like you get a job just because you're like a shithead college Republican from Clemson, you get a job at a like. representatives office and her like mandate to you until you like fully are in her trust is you have to go on Reddit and be like Nancy Mace got the wagon. And then she like, then people look at, she looks at your post to make sure that you're like complimentary. Yeah. I just think about, okay, you are a, you, you, you, you went to Clemson, you're a South Carolina native, you're like decently plugged in because your dad is like a prominent DUI attorney in fucking, you know, overseer counting. He's that attorney who killed his family. Your dad is... Murdok. Yeah, the Murdoch. Murdoch is the guy from lethal weapons. Yes. It's spelled the same. My son's too old for this shit. I'm killing him. But, uh, so you, you have a choice between Lindsey Graham and Nancy Mace and the office...

where you have the greatest chance of being sexually harassed is not Lindsey Graham's office. Yeah. That's repeat. It is not. That's insane. That there is an office more me tooish than Lindsey Graham. That's fucking insane. She was like, she was telling her mail staffers to like upload a video like POV videos of them jerking off and doing come tributes to them. To, like, the band subreddit for comb tributes, known as the Black Wolf Food. I'm just kidding. She's, yeah, by the way, people have pointed this out. I hate when, like, hot girls like that, real Stacey's ignore good guys who are trying to give them the world, have done everything that they have asked for at a guy. And I'm talking about brace building. Nancy, he was doing everything she asked for, and she's completely ignored him. Go on here. I love this. This is from her former raids. We were scared of her, said one of the former days. She would make staffers cry. She would threaten to fire them. Take their money away. Not give them raises. Not give them days off. Religious days. Intimacy only exacerbated the situation. The closer you get to her, the harder she messes up your brain, a different former staffer said. It's a classic story of never meet your heroes. No. All right. That was your hero. I would say it's also a classic story of not working hard enough on your heroes. Yeah, it's classic story of select better heroes. Yeah. Even if you're like a Republican shithead, like you can't. Like Stephen Miller. Stephen Miller has never been like, hey, make a plaster mold of my pussy now or I'll kill you. Like he's a bad guy, but still. One of them, one of them recalled dealing with a befuddled mace on a 2020 trip to Europe when they say she wanted to fire an aide for telling reporters she was out of the country claiming it endangered operational security and amounted to doxing her. Just as a, just as it aside. The definitional creep of the word doxing is like one of, it's just one of those things now that is just like, it's so funny that like what doxing now encompasses is just like, Being a public figure and someone's saying your name or being a Congress person whose schedule is like, you know, a matter of public record and like acknowledging that is like, you're doxing me. You're doxing. I've been doxed. You have to understand. I'm like the 300th most powerful person in the House of Representatives. And the people that are after me. Like, they start with the question, is she in the United States or not? And you just gave them my coordinates within the sense that I could be in any of the parts of the world that are. Where in the world is Representative Nancy Mace. I just love operational security. Like, she's in Taken. Yeah. She's really good. Which, like, she's more like the shake in Taken. Yeah. She's trying to find Leon Neeson's son. Like, she, like.

They're having auctions of corn fed football playing for high schools. Stolen out of high schools all over America. She's trying to find like, she's trying to find like guys who look like Richie Incognito. that she can, like, force to, like, just do all their work on a sex swing with her. She's, like, she's, like, she's, uh, she's trafficking guys from hunky firefighter calendars. And, like, threatening their families with death. If they blow the whistle. Dude, she's, she's sex trafficking, like, the young cons. Spencer, please put in the young cons anthem right here. I don't speak lies, but I spit the facts. 28% the new capital gains tax. I. don't know what she was doing in Europe, by the way, but I would bet money that it was like, it was some stupid thing where she went to Hungary and Viktor Orban was like, she was going to give her like a plaque of Chuck Norris or something. Just the most pointless thing ever. Going to be honored is like at the annual awards for the hottest members of Congress. Viktor Orban was going to pin a medal on her. Yeah, they're going to the country in Europe that leaves, like, the most obscene Instagram comments. Some place in the Balkans. Well, what she was doing in Europe, it says, so she... claimed it endangered operational security and amounted to doxing her. This despite having told a room full of her supporters about the trip at a party in South Carolina beforehand. She would definitely do it excessively, they said, of the Congresswoman's drinking and marijuana usage. And again, not to say that most members don't or most staff don't, but it got to the point where it was an issue. So she's like, just getting fucked up, like, just chief and loud. Just like... Just blowing on the private jet. Oh, man. Yeah, getting... And by the way, the rest of the piece takes a rather dark turn as she accuses her ex-boyfriend of, you know, drugging and raping women on the floor of Congress. But I think we'll leave it there. Well, Nancy, to me, you'll always be the hottest member of Congress. Long may she wave. There's an incredible, incredible podcasting career awaiting her in mere months. Oh my God, yes. I cannot wait to see her on that podcast with like that stupid guy who says he's a Christian, but just like argues with strippers all day. Yeah, yeah. Just like screams at the, the arguments they have are like, you know, showed a woman be allowed to have a car and a woman will go, well, you know, I have a job and I just like it would be good for me to. not have to walk on the highway. And he's like, you're a fucking bitch. Nancy. And they just share it in their awesome debate. He would be great on that show. Like, Nancy, if I ask you, how would you feel right now if you didn't smoke loud this morning? What would you say?

And then she's like, but I did, but I did get high this one. Yeah, yeah. But I, ah, but sir, I am gone off that loud. I am fucked up, right? I'm cross-fated on tequila and hydro right now. Yeah, like, I, I feel like she was, she was definitely drinking, like, you know, Bacardi 151. But her version of doing drugs, it's all gas station shit. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, this is actually, like, everything that you're describing there is like, K2 abuse, basically. Showing up at the airport and like instantly demanding to have your identity like concealed from everyone there. Like everyone out of the airport but me. Like that is, you're smoking that spice and getting on the two train and yelling that. Nancy Mace like whenever someone says her name, even when I see a picture of her, I have to like my brain just produces her image wearing a cookie monster pajamas. And I have to, like, remove it. I'm like, oh, yeah, she's like, I've never seen her wear that, even though it feels like I have. Well, you know, one last thing before we have to wrap it up today. Like, I feel like you say, like, you should have mentally, like, you put the cookie monster pajama skin on Nancy Mace whenever you imagine her. One last thing about another one of our favorite members of Congress. Representative Marie Gluica Perez. Now, I would say that whenever I see her, my mind immediately gives her like the sort of pre-order skin of girl who has chewed the strings out of her hoodie into like oblivion. Yeah. But then she actually did that video where like she was like scratching her face and fucking like twitching and, you know, just babbling about muttering about how we have to be strategic after she's like already voted to give ice the, all the money they asked her. Latest revelation. Dude, she's in that video wearing the official uniform of methadone clinic. At least in the northeast. Like, Jesus Christ, right. Well, this is Pacific Northwest here. And this is the latest revelation about Marie Gloomy Camp Perez. This comes courtesy of someone who posted. When I lived with, and by the way, they did an interview about this in just like a random post. It says, when I lived with Marie Glucin-Camp Perez, she would go through great lengths to not pay rent. One time, she attempted to pay with 100 pounds of rotten avocados she found while dumpster diving in Portland. I used to find this story charming, but not since she voted to fund DHS. She's a true, like, you know that shitty movie, Kate and Leopold? She's like if a, instead of a prince, a peasant was transported 900 years in the future. And it's, I mean, she kind of, it is someone who like went to college and got a job and made it to Congress. The first 20 years of their life being illiterate and only paying things through barter from their disgusting subsistence farm. It's incredible. Honestly, all of that, everything that you just described.

is remarkable enough on the merits to do all of that and then come out the other side also just obnoxious. Like the idea, I love the idea of like critical representation in Congress for like one guy who like literally joined the circus, never learned how to read, wound up starting up like a bicycle repair business somehow and is now like a pillar of his community. America is built on people like that. The idea that we got one of them in Congress from the Pacific Northwest and she's basically like, If Kristen Cinema had a, like, different aesthetic. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Well, um, and also it's just like, the audacity, like, imagine, imagine being the landlord and she's like, You're going to love what I'm going to give you in lieu of a check this month. It's merely 100 pounds of rotting avocados. And it would be one thing if it was just 100 pounds of avocados. Because I'd be like, what the fuck am I going to do this? Make guacamole. But in this case, you can't even do the guacamole thing. That option is by the... Yeah. Yeah, he asked her. He's like, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? And she's like... Throw it at the tax collector, duh. Yeah. She was showing up, scratching her face a lot and telling you how much avocados usually go for, like, per pound is, like, very easy for me to, like, I don't want to put myself in the shoes of a Portland, Oregon landlord who is renting to Marie Gluzenkamp Perez. That's not my type of person. Honestly, like, I kind of have to fuck with her because she's doing anti-landlord action. But like, I would carry over if any of her contemporary politics would match that former, that former youthful eccentricity. Yeah, like, you're doing, like, situationist style art pranks on your landlord, and then, like, fast forward 10 years. And you're basically like, well, you have to understand that a lot of ice guys, they have kids, too. Yeah. They live with their wives, but they, you know, like, she's like, look. The concentration camps are going to get built one way or the other. So we just have to be strategic about, you know, like who gets jobs there. Yeah. You know, like, people need jobs. Do you think it's like a bootstraps thing? And she's like, well, I pulled my, I bypassed mercantilism. I went straight from feudalism to industrial, post-industrial capitalism without any historically progressive forces helping me. I made a multi-century jump within my own lifetime. Never let someone tell me you can't go from being a weirder surf to being in the House of Representatives. All right. Let's wrap it up there for today, everybody. Once again, I want to thank David Roth for joining us. Always, always enjoy one of our favorites. Please check out David at Defector. And we will have links in the show description. And before we wrap it up, just a bit of a few announcements from me, starting with if you haven't already heard.

Our 10th anniversary live show is happening in Los Angeles, California at the Palace Theater on Friday, April 3rd. Tickets are now on sale, and there is a link in the episode description. It will be a star-studded event, a celebration of the decade of Chapo, featuring many beloved friends of the show, and of course, all of your favorite chopos. Now, normally when we say this, we're a thousand percent lying to you. to, you know, cover up with the fact that we are desperately want you to buy tickets or, you know, things just ain't selling as we, like, I might imagine. But believe me, tickets are going fast and seriously, we are not kidding. Like, this may be your last opportunity to get in before they sell out. So if you hear this announcement, please. Follow the link. Chapeau Trapp House 10th anniversary, Friday, April 3rd, the Palace Theater in Los Angeles. Tickets link will be in the episode description. Hit that up. There are not too many left. Yeah. The CEO of tickets just called us. They said that they have to put on the most powerful servers. to account for all the tickets they have to print. Also, just keep that in mind. Next, we have a quick update on our second printing of Matt's book, No Parasan. Your orders are now with the manufacturer, and they're estimating about a nine-week production timeline. So anticipate your books delivered sometime in April. So thanks again to everyone who ordered, and thank you for your patience. And then as always, follow us on Twitter at Chopo Trap House. Instagram at Chopo Trap House Real. Blue Sky at Chopo Trap House Real. And be sure to get every episode of the show by subscribing to us on Patreon at patreon.com slash chopo Trap House. See? We have a blue sky? Yeah, we do. How have we like not been banned from there? I think you've been blocked by 100,000 people there. Yeah. These guys are wreckers. They don't even share homemade memes. Yeah. Please come and scream at us on blue sky. Yeah. Tickets half off for all blues companies. We want to be killed at this show. That does it for today's episode, everybody. Until next time, bye-bye. Bye-bye.